The Perils of Fangorn
by SkyFire2
Summary: Celeborn *did* try to warn them about Fangorn Forest... Very Strange. FINISHED! Please R/R.
1. In the Beginning...

The Perils of Fangorn  
by SkyFire  
  
Disclaimer: Don't own 'em, wish I did. Only thing that's mine is the rabid plotbunny.   
Down, boy! Down! Good plotbunny. Gooood... no! Down! Bad plotbunny!   
  
A/N: This takes place the first night the three (Aragorn, Legolas and Gimli) enter Fangorn.   
I know that in the book, they didn't make camp next to the Entwade, but that's what works   
for this story, and since I'm the author what I say goes.   
  
Please send feedback; this is my first piece of fanfic. What do you think of it? What do   
you think should happen next?  
  
  
Setting: This starts the morning after their first night in Fangorn, camped beside the   
Entwade.  
  
*********************  
The Perils of Fangorn  
by SkyFire  
  
Part 1  
  
It was the screams that first roused him to full wakefulness. His hand reached   
automatically for his bow as he sat up in his blankets, head turning to locate the origin   
of the screams.  
  
It was Aragorn, who was staring in abject horror at his hands and arms, eyes wide.  
  
"Aragorn, I am trying to rest. Please stop screaming. You sound like a girl."  
  
Legolas sank back down to his blankets with a soft sigh and was just slipping back into   
that strange meditation elves used instead of mortal sleep when three thoughts popped   
themselves into his head, driving away all thoughts of further rest.  
  
The first was the realization that the Ranger's screams had blossomed into near-hysterical   
laughter.  
  
The second was the fact that not only did Aragorn *sound* like a girl, he also seems to   
have *become* one. Albeit a scruffy, athletic girl somewhat lost in the Ranger's   
clothes, but a girl nonetheless.  
  
The third being that his own voice, also, had changed, becoming somewhat higher in pitch   
and even smoother than before.  
  
With hands that shook, he pulled back the blankets that covered him and looked down at   
himself. He felt the same hysterical laughter that Aragorn now indulged in bubbling up   
inside him, and with only a supreme effort was he able to keep it back.   
  
The differences weren't really very obvious at first glance, as elven males and females   
were both slender by nature, but a second glance would show his clothes to be a bit   
roomier in the shoulders, as well as tighter across the chest.  
  
Not-quite-as-deep-as-they-should-be curses in dwarvish from Gimli's direction heralded the   
fact that he, too, was not quite himself either.  
  
'Alas!' the elf thought to himself. 'We should have heeded Celeborn's warning of the   
strange perils of Fangorn, and not drunk of the Entwade!'  
  
TBC... 


	2. Later that morning...

The Perils of Fangorn  
by SkyFire  
  
For disclaimer, see part 1.  
  
A/N: I'm not quite clear if in Tolkien's universe dwarf-maids have beards or not. They're   
not mentioned much at all. For this story, I'm saying they do have them. Just to make   
things interesting. I'm thinking of writing out the rest of the LotR story showing how it   
would be different according to this AU. What do you think would change?  
  
Let me know your thoughts/ideas about how this should go on, ok? Feedback is my friend.  
  
***  
The Perils of Fangorn  
by SkyFire  
  
Part 2  
  
An hour later, the hysterics were mostly at an end, though the shock had by no means   
worn off.  
  
Gimli was stomping around the camp, brandishing his axe at the air, cursing in a steady   
stream of dwarvish the mysterious grey-clad old man that they had seen on the   
outskirts of their last camp at Fangorn's edge. To the Dwarf's mind, that grey stranger   
was probably at least partly to blame for their current condition. He'd known that man   
would be trouble. Anyone who left behind no footprints visible to Elf or Ranger at   
their passing was bound to be trouble.  
  
It was rather difficult to tell, if one ignored the curses, that Gimli was anything   
other than his usual self; with his thick, partly braided beard covering his front to   
the waist, it was only with close scrutiny that it could be seen that he was slightly...   
rounder about the corners... than before.  
  
The Ranger had been silent the last hour, once his laughter had died down, busy fixing   
his clothing so that nothing would fall off or slide down as he moved.  
  
At last, Aragorn looked up at the others, finally done adjusting his clothing; he'd   
tightened every single lacing, buttoned every single button, and still he'd had to   
tighten his belt to the second-to-last hole to keep everything together. He'd even had   
to tie strips of cloth around the ankles and legs of his boots to improve the fit.   
Luckily, though, he could still wield his sword Anduril, if not quite as easily as   
before.  
  
Poor Legolas had been trying to practice with his bow as Aragorn practiced with Anduril,   
but he couldn't quite seem to figure out how to work around the extra weight on his   
chest. Bound by his leather tunic, they didn't stick out much, but still managed to   
subtly shift his balance, and he kept missing his mark by about the width of a hand. It   
was the worst he'd shot in hundreds of years.  
  
At last, though, they decided that they'd adjusted as much as they could for that   
morning, and that it was about time to continue their search for the missing hobbits.  
  
Their belongings were quickly packed away and the Entwade was left behind as they began   
their day's trek into the depths of Fangorn.  
  
  
TBC...   
(there should be more action next part... should there even *be* a next part? R/R) 


	3. The Grey Stranger

The Perils of Fangorn  
by SkyFire  
  
For disclaimer, see part 1.  
  
Warning: If you haven't read the Two Towers, this might not make much sense in places.   
Sorry, it can't be helped. Suffice to say, Merry and Pippin managed to get away from the   
orcs on their own, wandered into Fangorn and met up with the Ent, Treebeard.  
  
Please review! Feedback is my friend!   
  
***  
The Perils of Fangorn  
by SkyFire  
  
Part 3  
  
It was now early afternoon, and they'd been following hobbit-tracks for hours. The   
closeness of the wood, the sense of *age* that surrounded them was stifling and stuffy,   
and they found themselves somewhat short of breath as the time went on. It was with some   
relief, therefore, that they found that the tracks led them to Treebeard's Hill and up the   
rough steps to a flat shelf where they could rest in the freer air and sunlight.   
  
As they rested, they looked around from their high vantage point, trying to see if there   
was any indication of where the hobbits may have gone next, as Aragorn had told them that   
the tracks only went up the steps, not back down again.  
  
It was Legolas who saw him first; the old man in grey rags that they had seen before. He   
was walking swiftly through the wood, and the elf could see that he would reach the bottom   
of the steps before they could.  
  
"Look!" the elf said to her companions, pointing. "It's that old grey-cloaked man, coming   
swiftly through the wood to the stair."  
  
"Where?" asked Gimli, then he, too, saw the stranger. His face flushed an angry red as he   
pulled out his axe. "Let him come! My axe will get answers from him! I'll put a dent in   
him that he won't soon forget!"   
  
The old man, meanwhile, had reached the stairs and started to climb.  
  
Seeing that, the elf slowly strung her bow, but then only watched, arrow in hand, feeling   
a strange reluctance to attack. Aragorn also drew Anduril, though she kept it lowered   
unthreateningly, feeling the same reluctance as the elf.  
  
They saw a flash of white robes from beneath the shabby grey cloak, and readied their   
weapons despite their lethargy, as the only old man that they knew of who wore white robes   
and walked with a tall staff was the wizard, Saruman.   
  
Still, they didn't attack.  
  
The stranger finally reached the shelf where they stood armed and waiting. He lifted his   
face to them as he leaned on his staff and studied each in turn from under thick, bushy   
brows. He frowned.  
  
The three stared at him with shocked recognition, weapons falling to the ground from   
suddenly limp hands, arms hanging loose at their sides, unable to fully grasp the reality   
of what they were seeing, let alone form the words to say it.  
  
"I'm sorry, ladies," the old man said. "But I was supposed to meet three friends here,   
and it seems they're not... Legolas? Is that you? Gimli? Aragorn?" The old man's mouth   
twitched, looking suspiciously like a barely restrained smlie, his eyes twinkled with   
suppressed laughter. "What have you gotten yourselves into this time?"  
  
"Mithrandir!" Legolas was the first to regain the power of speech, and called out his   
friend's Elven name, a smile on his face.  
  
"Well met," agreed the other.  
  
"Gandalf?" Aragorn exclaimed. "But you fell into shadow - in Moria! The Balrog-"  
  
"Yes, I fell, and climbed, and through many hardships I am here again. Now, how is it that   
you've all become female?"  
  
Aragorn quickly told the tale, beginning with the Fellowship's escape from Moria.  
  
When he was done, Gandalf looked at them and shook his head. "Didn't Celeborn or Galadriel   
warn you of Fangorn? Well, there's naught we can do about this now. Now, we must be   
leaving for Edoras in Rohan to meet with king Theoden-"  
  
"But what of the hobbits, Merry and Pippin?" asked the dwarf. "We've come too far after   
them to abandon the chase now!"  
  
"They are safe with Treebeard the Ent. They met him here two days ago and went with him to   
his Enthouse. They are not now in danger, and are no longer our concern. Don't worry, for   
we shall see them again before the end, I suspect. Be patient. Shall we go now?"  
  
The three nodded and walked down the stairs, Legolas first, then Gimli, Aragorn, and Gandalf   
last.  
  
Aragorn made a small hop of surprise just before starting down, feeling a hand collide with   
her rear. She looked behind her, but Gandalf wore an expression of blank innocence, though   
the mouth-twitch and eye-twinkle were even worse than before. Shaking her head, Aragorn   
followed her companions down the stair, then straight out of Fangorn, where they were   
reunighted with their strayed horses.  
  
And so with Gandalf upon Shadowfax, Aragorn upon Hasufel, and Legolas and Gimli once again   
sharing Arod, they rode with all haste to Edoras.  
  
  
TBC...  
What do you think? Leave a review and let me know! 


	4. Rohan's Welcome

The Perils of Fangorn  
by SkyFire  
  
See disclaimer, part 1  
  
Please leave a review! I love reading them, and my poor, rabid plotbunnies will starve if you   
don't!   
  
*****  
The Perils of Fangorn  
by SkyFire  
  
Part 4  
  
They arrived at Edoras, the capital city of Rohan, in the early morning two days later, and rode   
up to gates guarded by many spear- and sword-wielding mail-clad Riders of Rohan.  
  
Upon seeing the four, mounted upon what were quite obviously horses of Rohan, the guards frowned,   
coming to the only conclusion that made sense to them.  
  
Before Aragorn or Gandalf could call out a greeting, the Riders closed in on the three females,   
wisely avoiding the wizard. The three were unceremoniously hauled off Hasufel and Arod, then   
relieved of their weapons and hustled within the walls of the city, then over to a stout stone   
building that stood midway between the city gates and the hall of King Theoden, Meduseld. As   
they were walked there, struggling the whole of the way, they were informed that they were being   
imprisoned for horse-theft and would be held in prison until such time as King Theoden passed   
judgement upon them.  
  
The three tried to explain the situation, tried to explain that they were but returning the   
horses leant to them by Eomer, but the guards acted deaf and dumb and refused to listen.  
  
Gandalf had followed closely behind and assured them, as they were being pulled inside the   
dimly-lit prison-building, that he would see them released after he spoke with Theoden.  
  
"Gandalf!" Aragorn shouted angrily, clinging stubbornly to the doorframe even as three guards   
tried to pry her loose. "Gandalf, don't leave us here! Gandalf! I am Aragorn, son of Arathorn,   
Isildur's heir of Gondor! I will not be falsely locked up for horse-theft! Gandalf!"  
  
The three guards shared a smirking glance that sared the thought as easily as if it had been   
spoken aloud. *The girl's obviously insane. She thinks she's a man!*  
  
Finally, they managed to pry the Ranger free of the doorframe, though she left long scratches   
behind on it that showed show her determination. They carried her, twisting and kicking, to the   
rows of cells where Legolas and Gimli were already locked up, each in their own cell. The guards   
opened a cell's thick wooden door, shoved Aragorn in, then quickly slammed the door and bolted it   
securely. Then they left.  
  
"Legolas? Gimli?" Aragorn called, moving to stand at the door of her cell. The door was perhaps   
four inches thick, and had a space cut into it at head-level and set with vertical bars. She   
peered out of her cell and called again. "Legolas? Gimli?"  
  
Legolas appeared in a cell across the hallway, looking out of the barred space on her own door at   
Aragorn. "I'm here," she said simply.  
  
A hand waved in the cell beside the Elf's, and Gimli's disgusted voice was heard. "I'm here, as   
well. Damned windows built for humans."  
  
"I see you," Aragorn said. The hand stopped waving, disappeared. "So, what do you think about   
our little predicament here?"  
  
"I think that you going around yelling 'I am Aragorn, son of Arathorn' isn't exactly helping   
right now, my friend," the dwarf said bluntly.  
  
"Much as it pains me," Legolas said, "I must agree with the dwarf. The situation is volatile   
enough without the Riders thinking you insane."  
  
"Oh. Well, I was angry." A slight pause. "I'm sorry."  
  
The three friends were quiet for a space as they thought of their situation and hoped Gandalf   
would hurry to get them out.  
  
"Well," Aragorn said at last. "Eomer knows we didn't steal Hasufel and Arod. He would know that   
we were just returning them, as promised. He can speak for us."  
  
"I would," came Eomer's voice from the cell beside Aragorn's, "but I've been falsely accused of   
treason and my word just now would likely do your cause more harm than good. Besides, the only   
voice that King Theoden listens to of late belongs to Grima Wormtongue."  
  
Aragorn groaned. Even Legolas looked somewhat grim.  
  
"It seems Gandalf might be a while, my friends," Aragorn said at last. "We may as well get   
comfortable." With a last nod across the hall to Legolas, Aragorn moved further into her cell.   
She sat down on the crude straw mattress to wait.  
  
In their cells, Legolas, Gimli and Eomer did the same.  
  
  
TBC...  
Please... Save the starving plotbunnies! Leave a review! 


	5. While In Prison...

The Perils of Fangorn  
by SkyFire  
  
See disclaimer, part 1  
  
Please leave a review! And thank you to everyone who already did! Don't hesitate to do so again!   
I just love reading the things. So do my plotbunnies.   
  
*****  
The Perils of Fangorn  
by SkyFire  
  
Part 5  
  
*Plink! Rattle-rattle-rattle.* Pause. *Plink! Rattle-rattle-rattle.*  
  
It had been hours since the three had been locked up in the Rohirrim prison, and as yet nothing   
had happened to break the monotony of their confinement. Every now and again, one of their   
guards would pass by, looking into their cells via the door-windows, checking to make sure that   
they hadn't escaped, then he left again.  
  
*Plink! Rattle-rattle-rattle.* Pause. *Plink! Rattle-rattle-rattle.*  
  
They sat in their dimly lit cells, waiting, memorizing the cracks in the walls and ceiling, the   
grain of the wood of the doors. Those who had outside windows, Legolas and Gimli, looked   
outside now and then. There was nothing else they could do.  
  
*Plink! Rattle-rattle-rattle.* Pause. *Plink! Rattle-rattle-rattle.*  
  
"Aragorn, if you throw that stone against the wall one more time, I swear to you that when we get   
out of this mess you *will* regret it!" came Gimli's irritated voice from across the hallway in   
her cell. "And I have nothing to do in here but to think of ways to be creative about it!"  
  
Legolas and Eomer quickly added their support to the dwarf's threats.  
  
There was a stretch of unbroken silence from the Ranger's cell. It lasted for maybe five   
minutes.  
  
*Plink! Rattle-rattle-rattle.* Pause. *Plink! Rattle-rattle-rattle.*  
  
"Aragorn!" the dwarf bellowed, echoed by Eomer.  
  
"Ssst!" came the Elf's voice from her cell. "I think something is happening. Someone just left   
the golden Hall and is heading this way." Legolas pressed her face up against the bars of her   
outside window and watched the other approach. "It is not Gandalf," she told her companions.   
"It is a Rider."  
  
The four went to the doors of their cells, the three who could peered out into the hallway, even   
as the dwarf once again cursed the window's height. They saw the Rider come into the building,   
saw him speak with a guard near the door. The guard was at first startled, then led the Rider   
toward the cells. They passed by Aragorn and Legolas, turned away from Gimli's door, and   
unbolted Eomer's.  
  
"King Theoden commands your presence," the man from the Hall said simply.  
  
"I want my sword," Eomer said as he stepped from his cell, "to lay at our King's feet."  
  
The Rider from the Hall nodded, and the guard scurried away to fetch the weapon.  
  
Eomer turned and began to walk away. As he did so, his gaze fell upon the Ranger. He did a   
double-take so harsh he nearly fell, even as his eyes widened. Legolas, across the hallway,   
laughed softly at the comical sight.  
  
"Aragorn?" Eomer asked in disbelief, going to the door of the other's cell. "Aragorn? What foul   
magic is this? It has been only five days since I left you and your companions with Hasufel and   
Arod. How did this happen since?"  
  
Aragorn said only one single word, the only word that was needed to explain everything.   
"Fangorn."  
  
"Ah!" Eomer said. "I did try to warn you it was dangerous. But even I could not have forseen   
this! You make for a scruffy woman, my friend. Perhaps, if you had a gown that fit..."  
  
"Eomer!" Aragorn said, face flushed with embarrassment. "I'll not wear a gown! Though, clothes   
that fit would be well appreciated - once my companions and I are freed."  
  
"Your companions," Eomer said. He turned to look now at Legolas. "And you? Did this...   
misfortune in Fangorn... also strike you?"  
  
"It struck all of us," Legolas said in confirmation.  
  
"Your sword," the newly-returned guard said, offering the sheathed blade to Eomer.  
  
"We must go to King Theoden," the Rider from the Hall told Eomer. "For he waits in the Hall with   
Gandalf."  
  
"Gandalf? Aragorn, did you not tell me he fell in battle?" Eomer asked.  
  
"He did. He came back."  
  
Still confused, Eomer and his escort left the prison for Meduseld.  
  
The three settled back down in their cells to wait once more.  
  
*Plink! Rattle-rattle-rattle.* Pause. *Plink! Rattle-rattle-rattle.*  
  
"Aragorn!"  
  
  
Little more than a half-hour had passed before Legolas spotted the same Rider as before once   
again coming to the prison, Eomer-less. "The Rider who took Eomer returns!" she told the others.  
  
Once again, they went to their cell doors and watched. They saw the other go to the same guard   
as before, heard him speak.  
  
"The three prisoners - Aragorn of Gondor, Legolas the Elf, and Gimli the Dwarf - are to be   
released at once and returned their weapons, by order of Theoden King."  
  
The trio sighed in relief as they were quickly let out of the small cells, were even more   
relieved upon the return of their weapons.  
  
"You are to follow me to Theoden's Hall of Meduseld, where you are to be washed and clothed and   
then brought to the King's table to eat," the Rider said, and led them from the prison, even as   
the sun at last sank below the horizon, lighting the sky with flaming orange, gold, red and   
purple.  
  
  
TBC...  
  
The rabid plotbunnies are going into starvation-shock! Quick, push the button and feed them some   
reviews! Oh, and I like them, too. 


	6. That Evening...

The Perils of Fangorn  
by SkyFire  
  
For disclaimer, see part 1.  
  
Feedback is my friend! Of course, so are the starving plotbunnies! Feed them a review!  
  
*****  
The Perils of Fangorn  
by SkyFire  
  
Part 6  
  
"Aragorn?" Legolas called, knocking on the door of the room that the other had been given.   
"Aragorn, King Theoden calls us to the board; it is time to eat." He paused. "Aragorn? Are you   
there?"  
  
"I'm here," came the reply, though the door remained locked between them. The tone was   
everything but happy. "And here I shall stay."  
  
"But Aragorn-" Legolas started.  
  
"No. I am *not* going out there."  
  
Legolas sighed. She did not know why Aragorn was being so stubborn. She herself had been happy   
to bathe properly for the first time since the Fellowship left Lothlorien. And she had to admit   
that the clothes she had been provided with *did* fit better, though now she could be mistaken   
for a Rider. Her own clothes were being cleaned and would be packed away with the rest of her   
things against the possibility that she wake up as herself again without warning.  
  
"Legolas!" Eomer called, approaching from down the hallway. He looked her over. "The clothes   
are to your liking?"  
  
"Yes," she answered simply. The shirt was of soft, fine white linen, the tunic over that was of   
soft, green-dyed leather as her other had been. Snug woolen leggings hugged her slender legs,   
and she wore her own shoes. "Thank you."  
  
"My pleasure," he said. He looked to the door they stood in front of. "Aragorn?" he asked the   
Elf.  
  
"She refuses to come out," Legolas answered with a shrug.  
  
"Ah," Eomer said. He pounded on the door. "Aragorn! Come out! It is time to be at meat! King   
Theoden awaits!"  
  
"I cannot go out, Eomer," came the reply. "Not like this!"  
  
"Aragorn, come out or I shall have to force the door."  
  
Eomer and Legolas waited patiently for maybe five minutes, hearing Aragorn's grumbles and curses   
from inside. Finally, however, the door was unbolted, then opened, and the Ranger stood in the   
doorway, face red with humiliation, scowling fiercely at Eomer.  
  
The Rider smiled widely at the sight, a smile that was quickly shared by the Elf.  
  
Aragorn had been transformed. Gone was the scruffy waif look; she looked like a true Lady, and   
she knew it. She was dressed in a gown of deep, dark green that flowed gracefully from shoulder   
to ankle in the front, with a three-foot train dragging on the floor behind her. The sleeves   
were bell-like, with the lower edge extended until it, too, dragged on the floor. The gown was   
cinched at the waist by a belt of flattened gold plates that contrasted beautifully against the   
green. Her hair had been styled as well, into neat curls and ringlets held back from her face by   
a thin gold circlet.  
  
"You do clean up well, my friend," Eomer said in satisfaction. "Don't you agree, Legolas?"  
  
"Yes," Legolas said. She knew that if she tried to say anything more she would burst out   
laughing, and the Ranger looked incensed enough without that.  
  
"I'll get you for this, Eomer," Aragorn said grimly.  
  
"Just consider it my portion of revenge for the stone-throwing in the prison today."  
  
They made their way to Theoden's table and took their places at it as the food was being served.  
  
"Let us eat now," Theoden said, "for Gandalf has told me of Saruman's treachery and we ride for   
Isengard. We shall leave in the first grey light of dawn."  
  
"Yes, let us eat," Gandalf said, staring straight at the flushed Aragorn.  
  
Gimli, the Ranger noted, had been given clothes not dissimilar to those that Legolas had been   
given, and wore her own dwarf-made mail over it. She also noted how the dwarf nearly strangled   
trying to hold back laughter from the sight of the gowned Dunedan.  
  
They ate, Theoden and Gandalf continuing and interrupted discussion, Legolas and Gimli having a   
conversation of their own, Eomer commenting occasionally into both conversations.  
  
Aragorn ate in silence, making and discarding plan after plan for revenge. She still hadn't   
decided on one by the time the meal was over. But she knew that whatever it was she finally   
decided on would be *very* memorable.  
  
She was smiling to herself as she left for her room. It gave the others the shivers.  
  
  
TBC...  
  
So, what vile plots has Aragorn hatched?   
Please! Leave a review! Plotbunnies are dropping like... well, plotbunnies! 


	7. Of Moonlight and Riding...

The Perils of Fangorn  
by SkyFire  
  
For disclaimer, see part 1.   
  
Save the whales?? Save the plotbunnies!! *g* Leave a review!  
  
*****  
The Perils of Fangorn  
by SkyFire  
  
Part 7  
  
Aragorn was quite relieved when she returned to her room after supper to find a good set of   
riding-clothes laid out for her, as well as a good set of shining mail from Theoden's own   
armoury. At least Eomer's revenge didn't extend to forcing her to ride in a dress and   
sidesaddle!  
  
Aware that they were making a very early start the next day, she quickly checked to make sure   
that her things were all packed and ready before taking off the fancy clothes she wore and   
dressing in a simple nightshirt, climbing into bed and quickly falling asleep.  
  
  
  
She was awakened not long after by Legolas, who wore a similar nightshirt, covered by a velvet   
robe.  
  
"Hsst! Aragorn! Awaken!" Legolas hissed, shaking the other by the shoulder.  
  
"Mmmph?" the human asked eloquently before coming fully awake and sitting up in bed. She could   
see the other in the light of the moon as it poured in through the window. "Legolas?" She could   
see the Elf's distress clearly in the moonlight. "What's wrong?"  
  
"Aragorn, I... I want to ask a favor of you," Legolas said hesitantly. "I wish that I could   
complete this Quest with you and the others, but I fear that I am dying, and-"  
  
"Dying?" Aragorn said harshly. She grabbed ahold of the Elf by the shoulders. "What do you   
mean, you are dying? You were fine this evening!"  
  
"Yes, I was. I do not know why this is happening. A short while ago, maybe a half of an hour, I   
was awakened by pain," Legolas said, one long-fingered hand rubbing at her abdomen. "After a   
little while, the pain eased slightly, but now there is blood.... Perhaps, once the Quest is   
finished, you could send word of me to my father in Mirkwood.... Aragorn? Aragorn, stop   
laughing. I am dying, and you are laughing?" Legolas frowned, hurt.  
  
Aragorn wiped at her streaming eyes, her laughter trailing off into chuckles. "Legolas, you   
surprise me sometimes. Do you mean to tell me that in all your centuries of life, you have never   
heard of a woman's moon-cycles?" He chuckled. "You are not dying, my friend."  
  
"No?" Legolas asked, relieved, though still upset at being laughed at. "But I am bleeding!"  
  
"Yes," Aragorn said, grinning. "And it will continue for *days*."  
  
"No," Legolas said, eyes wide in horror.  
  
"Yes," came the reply. Aragorn released her hold on the Elf, then got up out of bed and pulled   
on a robe, cinching it at her waist. "Let's go see the Healers here. I never even though that   
this might happen."  
  
"This might happen to you as well," Legolas realized. Somehow, knowing that someone else would   
suffer the same ordeal made the suffering and embarrassment somewhat less acute.  
  
The floor was chill against their feet as they left the Ranger's room, then walked to the   
Healers', having to go outside and cross maybe twenty feet of dewy grass to get to the Healers'   
building.  
  
Soon, they left to return to their rooms, each with a small bag of supplies, each with the memory   
of the Healer's short, terse lesson.  
  
  
  
The day dawned bright and sunny, and found the Riders already many miles from the Golden Hall of   
Meduseld.  
  
Gimli rode behind Eomer, speaking to him of Lothlorien and the beauty of the Lady Galadriel.  
  
Aragorn, happily dressed in her new, fitting, men's clothing, rode at the head of the group,   
speaking with Theoden and Gandalf.  
  
Legolas rode behind them, sitting her horse in silent misery. How could women bear this every   
month, she wondered. The memory of the sight of her own blood made her shiver, a feeling of   
distaste coursing through her. She'd seen her own blood before, been wounded and bandaged her   
own wounds. Blood had never bothered her before, but somehow this was different, more personal.   
Miserable.  
  
"Legolas!" Gandalf called. "You have the keenest eyes of all here. Can you see anything away   
yonder toward Isengard?" He pointed.  
  
Legolas looked in the indicated direction, shading her eyes with her hand. She could see a   
darkness there, with many great moving shapes in it, and it moved, flowing down from the hills.   
She told this to Gandalf, then retreated back into silence and misery, and kept to herself even   
when they pitched camp that evening.  
  
  
  
The afternoon of the next day they encountered a weary horseman who had clearly seen battle. He   
warned them of Saruman's orcs, his Uruk-Hai, who had fought the Riders at the Fords of Isen and   
were even now pursuing them toward Helm's Deep.  
  
And so Gandalf left them, riding away with all haste on an unexplained errand, even as Theoden   
led the rest quickly to the support of those at Helm's Deep.  
  
  
TBC...  
  
So. Am I twisted or am I? *g*  
Plotbunnies and authors both love reviews, so click the button and leave one! *g* 


	8. Frustrations at Helm's Deep

The Perils of Fangorn  
by SkyFire  
  
For disclaimer, see part 1.  
  
This chapter is kind of slow, I guess. Not much to poke fun at at Helm's Deep. More fun next   
time, promise! *g* Hobbits!! *g*  
  
Feed the plotbunnies! Make them happy! Leave a review!  
  
*****  
The Perils of Fangorn  
by SkyFire  
  
Part 8  
  
"Eomer!" Aragorn shouted as she beat at the thick, solid ironoak door. "Get back here! Eomer!"   
She pounded once more at the door, then turned away in disgust, stalking further into the barren   
stone room.  
  
At the far end of the room was a doorway with stairs leading up. Even as the Ranger walked   
towards them, though, she saw the Elf Legolas coming down the stairs.  
  
"Well, Elf?" Gimli asked.  
  
Legolas shook her head. "Eomer has been here before, to choose this place to hold us," she said.   
"This guardhouse has three levels, each as empty as this one. There are archer's windows facing   
the inner courtyard on the second level and facing outward on the third. There was perhaps roof   
access at one time, but if so the way is blocked from without, for the door will not move."  
  
"So we cannot get out until such time as someone outside unbars the first level's door and   
releases us?" Aragorn queried.  
  
"That appears to be the case," the Elf agreed.  
  
"Just wait until I get my hands on him! Just wait!" Aragorn seethed. "First the dress and now   
this! I always knew the Riders of Rohan do not, as a rule, let their women fight in battle with   
them, but this! He *knows* we are not truly women! But even so, to lock us in a guard tower!"  
  
"Peace, my friend," Legolas implored. "There must be more reason to it than that. But for now,   
here is where we shall remain."  
  
"Easy for you to say," Gimli grumbled, moving to sit with her back to one stone wall. "You can   
at least join in battle, even from here, because of those windows and your bow. My axe wishes to   
bathe in black orc-blood!"  
  
"Anduril as well," Aragorn muttered, slumping to sit in the floor as well. "I am Isildur's Heir   
of Gondor. I should be fighting on the wall with the rest, not holed up here."  
  
  
  
An hour passed. The three sat on the floor of the empty room, listening to the men outside   
preparing for battle.  
  
Gimli looked up from her newly-sharpened axe, looked over to study her two companions.  
  
Legolas, finally starting to become her old cheerful self again after several endless days of   
misery, sat oiling and polishing her bow. Apparently, the Elf wasn't quite as calm as she   
pretended to be, for the dwarf saw that if the Elf polished the wood any more, she wouldn't even   
have to shoot arrows at her enemies; the glare alone from the Sun bouncing off the gleaming wood   
would be enough to blind her opponents.  
  
Aragorn, Gimli saw, had already sharpened and oiled all her blades and now sat there restlessly,   
her gaze flicking between her hand and a nearby stone wall. Curious, Gimli squinted at Aragorn's   
hand, the better to make out what she was holding, finally seeing what it was.  
  
"Aragorn, put the stone down-"  
  
*Plink! Rattle-rattle-rattle.* The stone hit the wall, bounced off and rolled back to the   
Ranger, who picked it up again.  
  
"Aragorn!"  
  
  
  
The three companions dozed only occasionally that night, and those times were light, fitful   
things that gave them little rest, as the sounds of battle, somewhat muted by the stone, entered   
their tower.  
  
The sounds of battle grew and receded like waves on a shore as the battle first raged, then   
lulled, then raged once more, only to lull again, all through the night.  
  
Dim grey dawn-light fell upon the stairs from the windows of the levels above, and the three   
heard the sound of the Horns of Rohan sounding the charge.  
  
Aragorn, Legolas and Gimli hurried up to the third level of their prison and looked out over the   
torn battlefield through the archer's slits in the wall. They saw King Theoden leading the   
attack on the forces of Isengard from the front gate, even as Eomer, some distance away, led   
another force from out of the Deep against the foul army. Even stranger still, where before   
there had been only fields, now behind the Isengard army stood a strange forest clothed in   
impenetrable darkness that even the orcs feared to enter.  
  
From those windows, the three companions watched as the Rohirrim decimated the opposing force,   
emerging victorious at long last.  
  
  
  
It was nearly an hour later, though, before Eomer returned to the guardhouse and unbarred the   
door.  
  
Aragorn just stood there glaring at the man, silently wondering to herself how she could *ever*   
hope to heap *that* much revenge on anyone, even as she promised herself that she *would* find a   
way.  
  
Legolas and Gimli were quick to leave the area as the two humans faced each other, one   
battle-weary, the other simmering with the need for revenge. Seeing the newly-returned Gandalf   
speaking to Theoden, they walked that way.  
  
"You locked us up," Aragorn growled at Eomer through gritted teeth.  
  
Eomer nodded silently, unapologetically.  
  
"You locked us up," Aragorn repeated.  
  
Eomer saw a dangerous gleam in the Ranger's eyes, took a cautious step backwards. "Aragorn, I-"  
  
"You *locked us up*," Aragorn said yet again, then sprang at the other, hands reaching for the   
throat.  
  
Theoden and Gandalf, now accompanied by the Elf and dwarf, looked over at a surprised yelp to see   
Aragorn, hands outstretched, pursuing Eomer around the courtyard, snarling.  
  
Theoden shook his head at their antics. He looked to Gandalf. "Will they be ready to ride with   
us to Isengard, do you think?"  
  
Gandalf shook his head in exasperation. "We can only hope."  
  
  
TBC...  
  
Next stop: Isengard and hobbits!  
  
Leave a review!! Please? Pretty please with Legolas on top? (Or bottom?) *g* 


	9. Of Darkness and Hobbits

The Perils of Fangorn  
by SkyFire  
  
For disclaimer, see part 1.  
  
A/N: The beginning of the story is kind of choppy. For that, I am sorry, but nothing of much   
importance to the story happened during that time, and I didn't want to make the useless bit   
overlong, lest it overwhelm the rest. It slows down for the fourth paragraph, and stays that way,   
though, so it's not that bad.  
  
Please review!! I know around 600 people get the announcement. Surely, I can get more than 5-6   
reviews per chapter! I'm aiming for at least 10 this chapter. Come on! Don't be shy! Even if you   
review anonymously and just leave a smiley or an "I like it," I'll be happy! Please?  
  
*****  
The Perils of Fangorn  
by SkyFire  
  
Part 9  
  
It was nearing sunset by the time the group of riders rode out on the beginning of their journey   
to Isengard. In this group were Gandalf, Aragorn, Legolas and Gimli. With them also rode King   
Theoden, Eomer and twenty men of his household.  
  
They passed uneasily through the newly-appeared wood, keeping to the road. Once safely on the   
other side of the wood, Gandalf informed them of the distance to Isengard; fifteen leagues it was   
that stood between them and their destination.  
  
They camped that night beside the bed of the strangely-empty Isen river. They were awakened late   
that night by the alarmed calls of the night watchmen.  
  
The Moon was gone. Stars were shining above; but over the ground there crept a darkness blacker   
than the night. On both sides of the river it rolled towards them, going northward. (1)  
  
The darkness came to them and passed all around them. It harmed them not, though in it they   
could hear strange sounds and its darkness blinded their eyes so that they were unable to see.   
But at last the darkness had passed them by and continued with great speed on its way north.  
  
The members turned quickly at a muffled noise nearby, fearing some evil left by the strange   
darkness. What they saw was sonething else entirely.  
  
The wizard Gandalf had taken advantage of the distraction offered by the darkness and had grabbed   
firm hold of Aragorn. He had dipped her far enough back that she had to clutch at him to keep   
from falling and now he stood there, holding her, joined to her in firm, enthusiastic liplock.  
  
The muffled noise had come from Aragorn. Eyes wide in shock, she overcame her instinct to hang   
on to keep herself from falling, then flailed wildly with her arms, still making muffled noises   
of protest as she tried to free herself of the wizard who was as firmly attached as a leech.   
Actually, now that she thought about it, she had removed leeches with far less trouble than she   
was having removing the wizard!  
  
At last, after a loud cough from Eomer, whose throat bore bruises the size and shape of Aragorn's   
hands, Gandalf ended the kiss, let the Ranger stand on her own. He smiled at her, shrugged   
unapologetically. "In case it *was* some sort of nasty trick sent by Saruman that was meant to   
kill us," was all he said by was of explanation.  
  
Aragorn just stared, dazed, gulping air into oxygen-starved lungs.  
  
The others smirked or laughed aloud at her expression, then settled back down to attempt to   
resume their interrupted sleep.  
  
All but Eomer, that was, who went over to Gandalf. "Let me know the next time you find so good   
an excuse," he said quietly, "for that is a trick I would not mind trying on the fair Legolas."  
  
Gandalf nodded solemnly, then the two smiled at each other, joined in conspiracy.  
  
  
  
At dawn, they resumed their journey. Hours passed by uneventfully, though now everywhere they   
could see that the once-thriving land bore the scars of Saruman's descent into evil. Once-fertile   
fields and cropland lay fallow, full of weeds and brambles, with the stumps of burned and hewn   
groves of trees easily visible through the growth. Mists and steams lay thick over the land.   
Still they rode on.  
  
At last, Gandalf halted and beckoned to them; and they came, and saw that beyond him the mists   
had cleared, and a pale sunlight shone. The hour of noon had passed. They were come to the   
doors of Isengard. (2)  
  
The doors lay broken upon the ground. Broken stone lay scattered all around on the ground, for   
the walls and towers were torn apart and battered and rent all to pieces. Inside the broken   
walls, the ground sloped down in a gentle valley with the imposing tower of Orthanc standing dark   
and proud at its center. But now that valley was filled with filthy, steaming water and in it   
floated bits and pieces of wreckage. Slime now coated the bottom of the Orthanc tower where the   
water had risen to and then receded.  
  
The group sat their horses and stared in amazed disbelief, for they had expected to find Saruman   
still strong, still a major force to be dealt with, not this obvious defeat.  
  
It was as they sat there that they at last became aware of the two small figures lying on a heap   
of rubble, one seemingly asleep, the other lazily blowing bluish smoke rings.  
  
Then the awake figure noticed them and stood hastily. He bowed low to Eomer and Theoden.   
"Welcome, my Lords, to Isengard!" he greeted. Then he caught a glimpse of Aragorn and all his   
carefully rehearsed speech fled from his mind. His head whipped around, followed quickly by the   
rest of him, even as his eyes grew comically wide. "Strider?" he asked in disbelief. He looked   
her up and down, eyes growing ever wider. He kicked his companion ungently in the side to awaken   
him. "Pippin, wake up! Wake up now! The King of Rohan is here, and other Riders, and Gandalf.   
Pippin, get up! Look at Strider!" He turned back to Aragorn, whose face was slightly flushed at   
the reaction. "Strider! You... you're..." a strangled laugh escaped him. "You've got..." He   
cupped his hands an impressively volumptuous distance from the front of his chest. "You've got..."   
He burst out into uncontrollable laughter, laughing even harder the redder Aragorn's face got.  
  
Pippin was finally up. He took one look at the Ranger and joined his cousin in laughter.   
"Strider! You're a woman! And you've got... you've got..." he made the same gesture his cousin   
had. "A... chest!"  
  
Merry had collapsed, as he had laughed so hard he couldn't breathe and was very lightheaded and   
in danger of passing out.  
  
Pippin caught sight of Legolas, laughed harder. "Legolas? You, too?" He looked her over from   
head to toe. "Actually, you make a very nice woman." He smirked. "What happened?"  
  
Legolas blushed faintly at the compliment.  
  
"How is it that this didn't happen to you?" Aragorn asked the chuckling hobbit. "Surely you   
drank from the water in Fangorn as well."  
  
"Yes, we did. But nothing like this happened to *us*. The Entwash was quite delicious after   
being forced to eat orc-food and orc-drink."  
  
Legolas made a face, the very thought of orc-food and -drink enough to turn her stomach.  
  
"Entwash?" Gimli asked, speaking at last. "Not the Entwade?"  
  
"Entwade? Goodness, no! Celeborn and Galadriel said not to," Pippin said. "We -Merry and I-   
figured that the Entwash was safe enough to drink from where we were; it was where it ran into   
the river Anduin. We didn't drink from the deep-forest rivers. Treebeard gave us Ent-draught to   
drink instead."  
  
"Treebeard?"  
  
"The Ent. Oh!" he exclaimed. He turned back to Gandalf, Eomer and Theoden. "Treebeard told me   
to tell you that he would be at the north side of the valley should you wish to see him."  
  
Gandalf and the Rohirrim left, picking their slow way carefully around the valley towards the   
north side.  
  
Merry was still happily asphyxiating on the ground. "Strider!" he called with a giggle, "will   
you have my children?"  
  
Aragorn's face reddened even more. Legolas was alarmed; surely, if any more blood went to the   
human's face, there would be none left in the rest of him and she would perish!  
  
"Merry!" Pippin exclaimed with a giggle. "How could you say that? Without even going to dinner   
first! Besides, it was obvious that Gandalf has already marked a claim."  
  
Aragorn looked like she either wanted to throttle the two or have the earth open up and swallow   
her whole.  
  
"But where are my manners?" Pippin asked. He looked at the three. "Come and eat with us; there's   
plenty of food in the guard-house there. Man-food, not orc-food. It's good."  
  
And so, reunited once more, the five made their way to the guard-house and lunch.  
  
  
TBC...  
  
(1)Whole paragraph taken directly from the chapter in the Two Towers entitled "the Road to Isengard", page 539 of   
my copy (all 3 books and append. in 1 pbk. volume).  
(2)ditto, page 542 of my book.  
  
  
So, what did you think? Click the button and tell me! Come on! Please? What do you think should   
happen? Should Treebeard be able to cure them (he *is* the master of Fangorn's forest after all).   
And would they be cured completely, or should they still turn back into women for a few days   
every month? Let me know your thoughts! 


	10. Bad wizard! Bad!

The Perils of Fangorn  
by SkyFire  
  
For disclaimer, see part 1.  
  
Thanks for the great reviews for last chapter. Hopefully, the plotbunnies won't abandon me for   
*quite* as long this time, hmm? ;o)  
  
*****  
The Perils of Fangorn  
by SkyFire  
  
Part 10  
  
Aragorn, Legolas and Gimli were served a fine meal by the two amused hobbits. Merry seemed to be   
unable to stop trying to pinch Strider, and both hobbits couldn't stop chuckling throughout the   
meal. Afterward, their tales were shared outside as all but the Elf happily sat on the green   
grass and smoked the pipeweed the hobbits had found amongst the wreckage of the storerooms.   
Legolas lay back on the grass, watching the clouds and mist pass by while the others smoked.  
  
Once all the tales had been told, they went into the valley itself and met up once more with   
Gandalf and the Riders that had ridden to Isengard with them.  
  
Gandalf himself wanted to speak with Saruman before they left Isengard. Aragorn, Legolas, and   
Gimli decided to go with him, as did King Theoden and Eomer. The rest of the Riders and the two   
hobbits were to stay behind and wait at the bottom of the stairs for the group to come back down.  
  
Before they went to visit Saruman, Aragorn, Legolas, and Gimli went to speak with Treebeard the   
Ent. When they told him what had happened, and how, his great booming laugh echoed throughout   
the ruin of the Wizard's Vale. Many minutes later, once his laughter had died down somewhat, he   
told them that he would make a draught for them that would turn them back into themselves.  
  
So great was Aragorn's relief at the fact that they would soon have a cure that when she heard   
the latest of Merry's catcalls, she only smiled.  
  
Merry nudged Pippin in the ribs with his elbow. "See?" he said. "I told you she liked me better   
than Gandalf!"  
  
Hearing that, Gandalf scowled.  
  
Overhearing the hobbits' words, Legolas just shook her head in bemusement. She completely missed   
the dismayed look on Eomer's face when he heard of the imminent cure. She also missed the way   
his eyes narrowed as hastily-made plans formed in his head.  
  
Gimli saw Eomer's reaction, saw how he hurried over to speak in hushed murmurs with Gandalf. She   
also saw Gandalf cast a brief look to Aragorn before he and Eomer hurried over to speak with the   
Ent.  
  
None of that made *her* feel any better.  
  
Ever since their transformation, she had watched as men flung themselves at the Elf and Dunadan,   
with eyes gone glassy with lust. And yet not one- not a single one!- had even looked twice in   
her direction. Not that she *wanted* any such attentions; she would have chased the men away   
with her axe, had they dared! But the fact remained. No one had even *looked*.  
  
These depressing thoughts were pushed from her head with the smiling return of Gandalf and Eomer,   
to be replaced with another, more pressing: Those two are up to something.  
  
It wasn't a pleasant thought.  
  
***  
  
The meeting with Saruman went about as well as could be expected between the forces of good and   
an egocentric, power-hungry fallen Istari. Or at least, it *did* until Gandalf stepped aside   
enough for him to catch sight of Aragorn and Legolas.  
  
"How fitting!" he choked out in a sneering voice amidst peals of evil laughter. "So *this* is   
why I could no longer find you with the seeing-stone!" Then he caught sight of Gimli and his   
laughter cut off abruptly. He stared for a long moment, then spoke. "Long and long again it's   
been since I last saw something so beautiful! Say you'll come inside and stay with me for the   
rest of your life! I can picture it-"  
  
Gimli's face got redder and redder with both embarrassment and anger as Saruman went on at length   
and in great detail about such things as silks, feathers, fruits and female-beard fetishes.  
  
"Enough!" cried Gandalf at last, seeing Gimli nearly angry enough to tear the very stones of   
Orthanc asunder with her bare hands. "I think it is plain to see that she has no interest in   
your offer, Saruman."  
  
The fallen one's eyes darkened with anger at the dwarf's muttered 'aye'. "Spurn me, will you?   
Then suffer! I know the Ent is making a cure for your condition, Dunadan, Elf, and dwarf! But   
know this: I curse you! By my magic and power, for three consecutive days each month, at random,   
the cure will be reversed and you shall be as you are now- women!"  
  
"Saruman!" came Gandalf's interrupting shout- but too late.  
  
A blue glow sank quickly into the three, a spell cast by Saruman.  
  
The three stared at each other in shock. Then Argorn groaned.  
  
"Arwen isn't going to like this," he said.  
  
TBC...  
  
  
So, what did you think? Please leave a review; feed the plotbunnies! They've been gone on this   
fic for so long! 


	11. Revenge and Ent Draughts

The Perils of Fangorn  
by SkyFire  
  
For disclaimer, see part 1.  
  
A/N: Sorry it's taken so long! :o( But the Muses seem to be back on this one. Too bad this is   
the final chapter (though I've got some thoughts for an epilogue that'll go up after this   
chapter). Anyways, hope you enjoy the last "true" chapter of this fic, and don't forget to leave   
a review! :o) Many thanks to those who already have! ;oD  
  
Thoughts are in // //.  
  
*****  
The Perils of Fangorn  
by SkyFire  
  
Part 11  
  
Aragorn and Legolas picked their way carefully across the rubble-strewn courtyard around Saruman's   
tower, making their way over to the gatehouse where the hobbits had fed them earlier that day.  
  
Both wore expressions of frustration on their faces.  
  
The three transformed companions- Aragorn, Legolas, and Gimli -had gone to get their cures from   
Treebeard at dusk, as he had told them when they had asked for one that afternoon. They arrived   
at the arranged meeting-place only to be told by the Ent that their cures were not yet ready and   
that they should come back around noon the next day.  
  
It was as they had turned away and were making their way back to the others that Gimli told her   
companions about how she had seen Gandalf and Eomer go over to speak with the Ent shortly after   
they had been told of the imminent curing of the trio.  
  
Aragorn and Legolas shared a glance.  
  
"Gandalf," Aragorn growled.  
  
"And Eomer," Legolas added.  
  
And so now Aragorn and Legolas were on their way to the guardhouse, away from curious ears, to   
plot their revenge on their admirers.  
  
***  
  
Eomer looked up as someone came to a stop beside where he sat at his campfire that night. His   
breath caught in his throat as he saw Legolas standing there, a bottle of wine in her hand, the   
light of the moon and stars making her skin shine like liquid silver.  
  
"Legolas?" he asked.  
  
"Eomer," Legolas said in a husky voice that made Eomer feel like melting right into the ground in   
bliss.  
  
"Legolas," he managed to choke out. "What are you...?"  
  
Silvery laughter came from the Elf. "I am an Elf," she said, folding her legs gracefully to sit   
beside him. "I am a woman." A slight smirk. "I am the bearer of good wine...." One eyebrow   
cocked in question as she held out the bottle, offered it to him.  
  
With hands that shook slightly-- was he actually going to *get* what he had dreamed of these past   
few days?? --Eomer took the bottle from the Elf. He used his knife to remove the cork, looked   
around briefly, then back at Legolas. He offered her the bottle. "No goblets," he muttered.  
  
She smirked, raised the bottle to her lips and drank a small amount, then offered the bottle back   
to him. "I don't mind," she said simply.  
  
Feeling like he needed it, Eomer took several large gulps of the wine. Nearly instantly, he was   
lightheaded and dizzy, disoriented. He shook his head to clear it, but that only seemed to make   
it worse.  
  
"Le'glasss," he slurred. "Wha-?"  
  
The Elf watched as the bottle fell from Eomer's senseless hand, as the human fell back to lie   
flat on the ground.  
  
The last words Eomer heard before he lost consciousness sent shivers down his spine.  
  
"Revenge, Eomer," Legolas said simply, a small smirk upon her lips. "Revenge."  
  
***  
  
Legolas carried Eomer over to his tent, lay him down on the bedroll. She lay the wine bottle down   
gently on the floor in one corner, then went back out to see how Aragorn had fared.  
  
She walked in the direction Aragorn had told her she had planned to pull the same trick over on   
Gandalf, looking around with sharp Elven eyes for the Dunadan and Istari, finally finding them.   
She laughed.  
  
"'Is isn' fuddy!" Aragorn's muffled voice came from beneath the inebriated wizard. "Gimme outta   
'ere!"  
  
The Elf went over, rolled the snoring wizard off of Aragorn. "All went as planned, I take it?"  
  
Aragorn scowled. "Mostly. I didn't think that he would be so quick to jump me." She frowned at   
the Elf's slightly muffled snort. "All right, so I should have guessed from knowing how quickly   
he usually acted, but I didn't. Make yourself useful and help me carry him back to his tent."  
  
Together, the two lifted Gandalf, carried him to his tent and laid him out on his bedroll.  
  
Then the conspirators shared another glance.  
  
"Time for the rest of it, hmm?" Aragorn said in a subdued voice.  
  
Legolas nodded. "Yes. I will see you in the morning, my friend."  
  
The Ranger nodded. "In the morning."  
  
***  
  
Eomer groaned as he slowly came awake the next morning. He grimaced at both the pain in his   
throbbing head and the awful taste in his mouth. He kept his eyes firmly closed, knowing from   
past experience how the light would only worsen the pain in his hung-over head.  
  
//What happened last night?// he wondered. It was all a blur. There was only the vague memory   
of Legolas, holding out a bottle- //Legolas. Legolas has something to do with me being like   
this. But what?//  
  
It took a few minutes for his dazed mind to realize that he was naked under his blankets.  
  
It was another few long moments before he also realized that he was *not* alone. His arms were   
wrapped around something warm and soft....  
  
Confusion running through him, he dared crack open one bloodshot eye, looked what he held. He   
moaned in despair, closing his eyes again, now fighting desperately with his memory. He *had* to   
remember. He just *had* to!  
  
In his arms, as naked as he was, Legolas slumbered peacefully.  
  
He had finally lain with Legolas, and he couldn't remember a thing! It was a nightmare!  
  
Across the camp, Gandalf was making a similar and equally dismaying discovery.  
  
Legolas stirred at Eomer's moan, stretched unselfconsciously in the man's arms. Sharp green eyes   
focused on him and she smiled.  
  
"Good morning, Eomer," she said, standing. She gathered her clothing together from where they   
were scattered aroung the tent, started to dress. "I wanted to say thank you for last night.   
Since I am becoming myself again today, I could not help but satisfy my curiosity about how it is   
like... for a woman...." She smiled. "You showed me. Thank you."  
  
Eomer sat up in his blankets just in time to recieve a chaste kiss on the cheek, then Legolas was   
gone from his tent and he was left alone to battle in vain with his memory.  
  
***  
  
Legolas looked up from her breakfast as Aragorn sat down on the ground beside her. She smiled at   
her friend. "And...?" she asked.  
  
Aragorn smiled in satisfaction. "He believed it," she said with a wide grin. "And you?"  
  
"The same," the Elf confided. "Poor Eomer and Gandalf. How long do you think it will be before   
they come to realize that it never actually happened?"  
  
"As long as it's *after* we've been given Treebeard's draught, I don't care," came the reply.  
  
"After that," Legolas agreed. She cast a glance to the sky, then back down at her   
companion. "Let us finish breaking our fast, then seek out Gimli. It is near enough to noon   
that perhaps Treebeard is done making our cure."  
  
Aragorn nodded. "Yes."  
  
Within the hour, the trio were once again on their way over to the spot where Treebeard waited.  
  
Within minutes of drinking their draughts, the three were overcome by waves sleepiness and lay   
down, asleep before their heads touched the grass.  
  
***  
  
It wasn't screams that woke her this time. It was loud peals of nearly deliriously happy   
laughter. It took but a moment for her somewhat fogged mind to think what would cause Aragorn to   
laugh like that. Then realization set in and Legolas sat up abruptly, looking down at herself,   
her laughter rising in the air to join Aragorn's as she realized that she was a she no longer,   
but once again male as he was born to be.  
  
"It worked," he gasped between peals of delighted laughter- in his own slightly deeper voice.   
"It worked!"  
  
Soon, even Gimli was laughing in delight.  
  
All three were relieved. Being women had been... different... but they were glad to be   
themselves once more instead of strangers in their own bodies. Or was that 'being themselves in   
strange bodies'? Whichever, it was finally over!  
  
The memory of Saruman's curse upon them had completely feld their minds.  
  
Beaming happily, the three made their way back to the campsite to join up with the others.  
  
Eomer and Gandalf went about frowning and pouting for the rest of the day, both over their   
'memory loss' and the fact that the Elf and Ranger were women no more.  
  
  
*****  
TBC in the Epilogue...  
  
  
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	12. Epilogue

The Perils of Fangorn  
by SkyFire  
  
For disclaimer, see part 1.  
  
A/N: Beware of odd-seeming jumps in time and space... *grin*  
  
Thoughts are in // //.  
  
*****  
The Perils of Fangorn  
by SkyFire  
  
Part 12: Epilogue  
  
**Two Weeks after Aragorn's Wedding**  
  
Arwen stretched in bed, yawning, blinking still-sleepy eyes as she stared out over the large   
bedchamber she shared with Aragorn. The soft grey pre-dawn light filled the room, spilling in   
from the balcony windows.  
  
With a sleepy smile, she turned over onto her side and looked over at her husband. The Kingship   
suited him, she had thought more than once over the past two weeks. That didn't surprise her;   
he'd always been a leader of Men. Be it Rangers or an entire country, it was merely a matter of   
degree.  
  
Her smile turned into a frown as her sleep-fogged mind registered that something just wasn't   
right about how Aragorn was lying there on his side, facing away from her. But what was it?  
  
Arwen's dark eyes swept slowly over him, searching for the source of her unease.  
  
//There is no obvious blood or wounding. He does not appear to be injured. What is wrong,   
then?// she thought. //Sleep-ruffled hair; softly curving shoulder; smooth, soft skin; small   
waist; curving hips- What the-?//  
  
Arwen lifted the sheet, peered at him again. Yes. His skin was different, softer and smoother   
than before, with less muscle definition. He was smaller in stature than he had been when they   
went to bed, and his proportions were not right. They were those of a-  
  
Arwen flung back the sheets, grabbed hold of her bedmate by the shoulder and yanked them over to   
face her. "Who are you and where is my-- Aragorn?!"  
  
  
  
***  
**Mirkwood, nearly a year after Legolas' return, shortly before his move to Ithilien**  
  
  
"Legolas?" the somewhat frustrated voice called yet again, knocking once more on the prince's   
door. "Legolas, come out! It is nearly time for us to hold court!"  
  
From inside the room came a slightly off-sounding voice. "Just" -a small grunt- "give me a   
moment to finish getting dressed, Father."  
  
"Give you a moment? Legolas, I have been out here in the hallway for the last half-hour's worth   
of moments! Come out! No, don't bother. This is my palace and I'm coming in."  
  
Thranduil turned the handle, opened the door and went in, closing it behind him. He turned to   
face his son, an exasperated smile on his lips. The smile froze, melted away.  
  
Legolas stood before him, staring at his father in alarm. He was dressed in nothing but his   
green leggings and low shoes, and his hands were occupied with the bandages he was wrapping about   
his chest. Without his shirt and tunic on to offer concealment, the... additions... to his chest   
were rather noticeable. "Father!"  
  
"Legolas?!" Thranduil stared, then looked up to meet his son's -daughter's??- eyes. "By the   
Valar, what happened to you?! How long have you been... been..." he waved at the other's form,   
"like this?"  
  
"Father, it is not always like this. It is only for three days each month... I-I... can   
explain?" Legolas quickly finished wrapping her chest, put on shirt and tunic before going over   
and pulling her father gently to a seat by the fireplace, taking the other seat for herself.  
  
With her clothes on, if he hadn't known what to look for, Thranduil wouldn't have known that   
anything was different with his... Legolas. "Speak."  
  
"It started like this, Father...."  
  
  
  
***  
**The Lonely Mountain, shortly before Gimli's move to the Glittering Caves**  
  
  
"Not again," Gimli moaned in frustration. Nearly a year had passed since he had returned to the   
Mountain, and he *still* hadn't gotten used to the monthly 'change'. It seemed to him that every   
time he turned around, *poof!* he was male, then *poof!* he wasn't.   
  
But that wasn't the worst part.  
  
With a heavy sigh, she pulled on her rich, heavy clothes, carefully combed and braided hair and   
beard, then went out of her room and walked down the crowded hallway to breakfast.  
  
She was greeted as she walked, most of the other dwarves giving her a simple 'Gimli' and a nod.  
  
//Argh!!// she thought to herself as she walked. //It was one thing when I was away with the   
remains of the Fellowship and none of the humans we encountered noticed that I was female. But   
*dwarves* don't seem to know the difference either?! ARGH!!//  
  
  
END  
  
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